What’s better than a birthday card? A lot.

Last year Seth Godin wrote a post about how we should celebrate birthday’s, and his words have remained a part of my life since reading them. He was right, after all, that birthday cards are too small-minded as a gift to someone, and instead we should try to find something to do in honor of them, to show that we respect and support some aspect of their life.

I have a friend who really wants to be a bartender, and so I would ask her to teach me how to make some drinks (shows I respect her expertise and want to be an active part of her life). Another works for a non-profit group that does work to make their city look awesome, so for them I would sacrifice a day to do work for them in that community.

It’s more than just buying someone a gift, I think. It’s about being a part of their life and letting them know you care about what they are doing. If you put some thought into it, you will be much more satisfied with what you do over what you give (and it may be cheaper, too).

There’s always something that sparks these little ideas in my head, and I may as well share where this one came from as well. In my family I believe that there is one man who brings us together in some pretty amazing ways. Without him, my family members would probably hardly be with each other, and then only to fight about something dumb. While most of us get uncomfortable when we get around each other, we always do it so that we can be with him and see him happy.

That man is my grandfather. For the 21 years I’ve been alive, the three divorces, the 25 moves, foster-care, adoption and then being made to leave my family at 17, my grandfather has been there for me the whole time. When I was younger he would drive 13 hours straight, only to see me for an hour and then drive back home again. Not to mention the things he has done for the rest of the family to be supportive. The man is the epitome of family love and generosity, who has always worked with great integrity to put his bloodline first.

That’s why I’ve decided, even before I get into a relationship again, that to celebrate his life I want to have my wedding on his birthday. In the same way that he has worked to make family his priority for 60 years, I want him to know that I’ll work for the same, thanks to him. A cheesey card is nice for about 30 seconds, a Lowes Gift Card is cool for about 20 minutes. But this dedication of the most important day of my life; well, hopefully that shows him just how great of a man I believe him to be.

Hopefully my wife doesn’t have plans for that day. What will you do for the people you love?